I had a good day yesterday.  It was a day filled with good moments, but during the course of the day I made a few choices that were not the best choices for me.  Choices that relate to old habitual patterns of living, ones that do not serve me well and that I am trying to replace with better ones.  I am making progress in that regard over time, but occasionally I do regress and repeat the old less than desirable choices.

And as is typical when that happens, I woke up this morning regretting it.  My auto-pilot was to immediately move into feelings of shame and beating myself up about it.  I had to put energy into just acknowledging what I had done, allowing myself to feel the sadness I feel after making those kinds of choices, and then letting it go and moving on with renewed intention to make better choices today.

After I made my morning tea, I sat down to have my morning meditation and quiet time.  I settled into my chair and spent some time looking out the window at the beautiful morning. I began to quiet my body and mind and sat in stillness, breathing in and breathing out.  I sat like that for a while and then moved into meditation.  

My meditation was a beautiful experience this morning.  I seemed to settle into it very naturally and easily.  I focused on my in breath and my out breath.  I came home to my body.  I felt the wonderful peace that is part of being in that place come over me.  

And occasionally, as is always part of my meditation practice, I would feel my thoughts start to wander.  Whenever that happened, I just noticed it and then gently brought my focus back to my breathing.  My in breath and my out breath.  That process continued during the course of my meditation time.

After I finished my meditation, I sat with my tea and reflected on the experience.  And while I was doing that, some clarity came to me relating to what I had been dealing with earlier in the morning.  I thought about how in the course of my meditation, whenever my thoughts wander, I simply notice it and then gently bring my focus back to my breathing.  I let what happened with my wandering thoughts go and I just move on with my meditation.  I have practiced that many times now, whenever I meditate, and it has become easier and more natural for me to do.

I thought about how that is really the same thing as when I mess up in my daily living and make choices that are not the best choices.  That is a repetitive habit for me too, just like wandering thoughts in meditation.  I realized that I need to practice the same gentle acceptance of my imperfect self when I make choices I regret as I do when I deal with wandering thoughts in meditation.  I need to practice the same process of noticing and acknowledging what I have done, accepting that I am imperfect, and then gently bringing myself back on track.  I need to practice letting it go, and moving on.  

I saw how I have been putting a lot of mental and emotional energy into dwelling on mistakes I have made, giving a lot of energy to feelings of shame and beating myself up.  I saw that instead of doing that, I need to focus my energy on acknowledging and then letting go of what is now in the past.  Accepting that I am an imperfect person.  I need to center in the now, not in what I have done in the past, and use my energy to continue to move forward in a positive way.

This was a big moment of clarity for me.  I think this is an important lesson in accepting myself as I am, and in learning to let go of things that do not serve me.  Maybe this is a step on my path toward truly embracing more acceptance and compassion for myself. 

Today has been a morning filled with simple things.  Good things, but simple things.  And once again, I have experienced the truth that the most simple things can be very powerful.

I hope you accept yourself today with gentleness, love, and compassion.